Anyone who has ever spent any time with kids will tell you that they can say some pretty
F*^%ed up S#%6 intresting things. Here are a few of our more memorable conversations that we have had this week.
Over the course of several days I rounded up my 3 boys and husband for haircuts. I got out our trusty clippers and found a board on pintrest that taught me the proper way to use the clippers (big ahhh haaaa moment) Giving little boys a haircut can be a freaking nightmare. surprisingly 3-year-old Noah was one of the easiest. Sawyer on the other hand not so much, he needed to be
threatened convinced to comply.
Me-” Sawyer you NEED a haircut! I will NOT have you going around looking like a poor little ragamuffin whose parents can’t even afford to give you a decent hair cut!”
Sawyer “Mom! why can’t we just go to the salon!” ( we have a very nice one a hop skip and jump from our house)
Me “No Sawyer! you know we can’t afford that shit!”
at this point he gives me “the look” like really mom? and we both know how stupid i sound but he values his 5-year-old life too much to mention it 🙂
Adrianna over one of our delightful dinner conversations demanded to know exactly how old I was when I got pregnant for Kimberly. This is obviously a source of embarrassment but I try to be honest with my children. Big mistake. I should have just lied until they decided to do the math by themselves. Adrianna then informed me, and I quote “If you were my child I would have tied you up to the bed and beat you for that!” well I’m glad this little nazi is my child not my parent! sheesh
While reprimanding my darling 12-year-old son Evan for laughing at my weakness while I struggled to lift a heavy log i laid into him with the whole “I gave birth to you speech” saying “listen here! I am much tougher then I look! You know I had without any pain medication!”
Then Kimberly quipped “yeah Evan, you know Mom pulled you out herself right?”
me-” Yes Evan I reached down, grabbed ahold of you and pulled you out myself!”
To which my darling son for some reason was completely horrified said ‘What is WRONG WITH YOU????? NO WONDER I”M IN SPECIAL CLASSES!!!”
I just rolled my eyes at that one, it’s not like i dropped him or anything! (that was Kimberly, but we don’t talk about that, I just shake my head sadly at her lack of coordination which *might* be related to the before mentions incident)